Worst Hair Metal Band Ever???

Today I did something very rare for me-I left the house without my iPod. And I actually listened to the radio while driving. And while listening to the Loop, I heard something very distrubing. Apparantly, Yahoo decided that the 80s hair metal band-Poison-is the "#1 worst hair metal band ever". Wow. I think the people at Yahoo have too much time on their hands. As a now 30something, I spent my fun and fleeting teen years during the late 80s and early 90s. The time when hair metal was all the rage and then it started to die out for Grunge in about 91. Now, before you start criticizing hair metal in general, let me list some reasons why it is a valid form of music:

1) People critize it for "not being serious". It's not supposed to be serious. It's supposed to be nothing but fun. It was spawned by guys in their teens and 20s with too much time on their hands, too much sex drive, too much energy (and perhaps they were bipolar too?) too many drugs and alcohol and without any serious goals in life to pursue. So OF COURSE IT IS NOT SERIOUS!

2) That being said, it is music to just cut loose to and feel good about and have some fun. Enjoying the forbidden, such as partying and sex without any emotional connections. Like you can do to an extent when you're young and still move on with a real life after that. Did I mention this music was invented by GUYS in their teens and 20s?

3) People also criticize it for being "posers" to real heavy metal music (such as Metallica, Megadeath, Iron Maiden, etc.). Real "heavy metal" music is purely anger driven. And I can understand that. It is a valid form of expression. If you look at the personal histories of heavy metal musicians, there is nothing but anger in their pasts that they could not cope with. Almost all of them grew up in poverty, had abusive or neglectful parents, had no supervision and basically began drinking, drugging, and everything else that you're not supposed to do. So of course, real heavy metal music is very angry. And that's ok. When you experience all that is wrong with the world and nothing that is good about it when you're growing up, how do you think your outlook on others and the world is going to be? Hair metal, on the other hand, was created by guys who were influenced by heavy metal but wen't so pissed off at the world, hence, why it is young, energetic, and FUN!

4) Hair Metal was by guys secure enough with themselves that they could be heterosexual and have long hair, without being hippies (hence the term "hair" metal). And as a heterosexual woman, there is something so raw and primal about long hair on a guy that is so attractive (unless he has a bald spot, is over 50, or has really fine or thinning hair, then it should be short in my opinion).

Now for the meat of my rant: How could they have said Poison is the worst hair metal band ever??? They had, according to Wikipedia, 3 multi-platinum albums. I have heard almost all hair metal bands and there are many that were 1 hit wonders (like Kix or Faster Pussycat as some examples of forgettable bands) that could have easily been the "worst hair metal band ever". How can they say Poison was the worst? Poison was the quintessential hair metal band! They made it big when all of the original members were in their mid-20s. They were sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll. And they were YOUNG and ENERGETIC and OVERSEXED! That's what hair metal is! Oh yeah, they had to have had some talent to sell as many millions as they did! And their music still sells now, 20 years later! Yahoo, I think your vote was cast by those who don't like hair metal in the first place! That's like having 50 cent critique County music.